costcoreceipt:

dinofarts:

TODAY IN BIOLOGY CLASS WE LEARNED THAT WHEN YOU MOW THE GRASS THE BLADES RELEASE A CHEMICAL THAT MAKES THAT GLORIOUS SMELL BUT THE REASON WHY THEY RELEASE THE CHEMICAL IS TO WARN OTHER GRASS BLADES OF DANGER SO WHEN WE SMELL THE FRESHLY CUT GRASS SMELL IT’S NOT JUST A GOOD SMELL IT’S THE SMELL OF THE BLOOD AND SCREAMS FOR HELP OF THOUSANDS OF GRASS BLADES

ok they going to warn the grass and then what ? explain how the other grass will run away from the lawmower ?

(via jokesmymomwouldlike)

j

avalar:

nothing annoys me more than when i try to switch tabs and i accidentally drag that tab to make a new window 

like why you gotta be like that man

(via fuckyeahtxtposts)

darmani:

thatkilljoy:

chromeofficial:

nothing is more satisfying than someone walking right past ur hiding spot in hide and seek

how old are you

"thatkilljoy" living up to the url i see

(via fuckyeahtxtposts)

gallows-calibrating:

one time I had this dream that I logged on to amazon and my account had like negative four trillion dollars because i accidentally bought the city of Paris

(Source: gayuranus, via eternal-reveries)

twinkjared:

Friendly reminder that for the SPN season five premier, luciferiscoming trended worldwide, and P. Diddy freaked the fuck out and thought Satanists were coming onto Twitter, so he got the tag banned and trended godishere in response.

(via just-take-me-to--neverland)

tricksterity:

the worst things to ever happen to fashion:

  • fake pockets
  • making every single shirt see through
  • seriously why does it have to be see through
  • what is the fucking point i just have to wear another tank top or cami underneath it
  • it literally defeats the purpose of being a shirt
  • and every single shirt is see through these days this annoys me more than fake pockets and trust me that is an issue

(via inatrailoffire)

swiggityswee:

THE WORST THING IN THE WORLD IS WHEN SOMEONE OFFERS U CHIPS AND U REACH IN THE BAG BUT U CAN’T GET A HOLD OF A CHIP AND U START SWEATIN’ AND PEOPLE ARE STARING CUZ U CAN’T GET HOLD OF A CHIP AND THEN CHILDREN ARE SCREAMING AND U HEAR GUNSHOTS AND BUILDINGS START COLLAPSING BUT U STILL. CAN’T. GET. A. CHIP.

(via just-take-me-to--neverland)

The lack of tattoos on my body is highly upsetting.

(Source: jabberwockysuperfly, via just-take-me-to--neverland)